Dedicated To Arthur

My Grandfather died on the 16^th January this year.  I made a trip home to Scotland to pay my last respects to him.   His name was Arthur.  I’ve written down some of what he meant to me and a bit about his life. 

 I enjoyed listening to stories from his childhood.  Listening to him tell tales from the High Street and the Canon Gate in Edinburgh was fascinating.  Tales of happy times, the sorrows he experienced, the love he had for his family and the hilarious tales of causing trouble with local police and running wild through Edinburgh with his chums kept me entertained over the years.

His war stories often entertained me too.  Tales of camaraderie, men fighting for a cause and the various jobs he performed while in the RAF.  His war stories often also brought a tear to his eye as he remembered the harsher side of this time in his life.  The war had a big impact on him and his time in the RAF informed a lot of how he lived the rest of his life.  It made him a man who was relentless and unwavering in his opinions and convictions but who underneath it all was caring and compassionate and who strived, in his own way, to do the right thing.

He always felt let down by the government by the lack of support servicemen received after returning from the front line and this feeling remained a constant throughout his life and informed his politics.  From these no one could hide!!!  Believe me!  He was a staunch SNP supporter who would have loved to have been around for the upcoming referendum.

I visited him over Christmas.  He was always happy to see me but told me point blank this time that I was not getting him out of the house.  I wasn’t happy about this but succumbed to his wishes.  He had grown tired and enjoyed the comfort and warmth of his house.  To the end - he refused to move.  Advice was given to us that he should be moved to a hospice to ensure he remained comfortable but Arthur was adamant he wanted to spend his last days in his house.  My family all shared responsibility and made sure he was cared for around the clock. My sister, who also lives abroad, managed to make it home to help care for him in last few days.  He affectionately told her she was the best nurse in the world.

The clearest and happiest memories I have of my Grandad are the times I spent with him, on my own, on our little day trips in and around Edinburgh.  We often went to the Gyle, shopping, or to a café or restaurant for lunch.  We often just drove around because I had gotten us lost.  I’m unsure whether he actually enjoyed the driving parts as he regularly told me to slow down, watch out or mind the light.  He said my driving of his wheelchair was just as bad as my driving of the car.  However, we would chat and discuss anything from families, to politics, the Queen and the BBC.  We would put the world to rights and happily disagree on various things. 

I spoke to my Grandad on the phone a few days before he passed.  He made sure he told me that he loved me and that I wasn’t to come home, in fact, he said he would be angry at me if I came home.  In our usual fashion we didn’t agree - obviously.

Arthur was something different to all of us; his children, his daughter in law, his son in law and his Grandchildren.  We all have different memories of him but the one thing we have in common is that Arthur loved us all and was proud of us all. He wanted us all to have a happy life and pursue our dreams.  He didn’t want us to grieve too much over him.  In fact he specifically told us not to in a letter he penned a few years back.  He ensured we knew what to do when he passed and how much he cared for us.  This is typical of Arthur.

My Grandad had a strong faith and he wholeheartedly believed he was going to meet his wife and his daughter in heaven.  He imagined them welcoming him with open arms and them all having a good catch up over a cup of tea somewhere out there.  He wasn’t scared, worried or regretful.  He was at peace and happy that he had made it to 92.  

So this is goodbye to a loving, cherished Grandfather.  May he rest in peace.