Naija Time

This is my second year in Lagos so you would think I had got used to the day to day societal/social norms.  However, there are some quirks (specific to Lagos) that I just can't get used to.  Most specifically I still can't get my timing right. ' Naija time' dictates that a person must perpetually run at least two hours late for all social events and interactions.  If an invitation requests your presence at 5pm then it would be ridiculous for you to turn up any time before 7.30.  If you do you will be embarrassingly early and be the only person there.

Confusingly business meetings and work related encounters tend to run on time.  So if you stick to naija time for these then you will look unprofessional and probably irritate someone you work for. Similarly most expats still stick to 'normal' time.

Obviously I perpetually get it wrong.  I am not, and have never been, the best time keeper in the world and so here in Lagos I find it even harder than usual to get it right.  I can't seem to avoid the embarrassment of arriving early at functions nor being late for work and work related things.

This weekend my friend and I were invited to attend a fashion show at a local hotel.  It sounded fun but started at 3pm.  We discussed, and decided a good time to go would be around 5.30.  We thought that people would have arrived by then and the catwalk would just be starting.  How wrong we were.  For some reason we didn't get the memo that the fashion show would start around 6.30 and would be pretty rubbish.  The after party would start at 8.30 and get going around 9.30.  My friend and I sat like a couple of melons waiting for something to happen for an hour or so before we decided to give up.  Our Saturday night plans changed drastically and we resorted to pizza and beers with a poolside setting.  We were too embarrassed to go back for more fashion.

On the flip side I was invited, by an expat couple who have lived in Nigeria for over five years, to a dinner party at their house this week.  I was told to come for around 7.30.  I presumed that they would work to naija time as they have been here so long.  I got stressed about being late/early so opted for being a cool 45 mins late.  I walked in half way through the starter and realised they had sent a search party out looking for me in case I was lost.

You see my predicament!!  One of these days I will get it right.

Going North

Which people are risk takers?  Is it the people who decide to change the cereal they buy each week and risk not liking the new brand or is it the people who jump from planes with only a simple nylon parachute to save them from becoming a human pancake?

It’s all relative really.  The person buying the new cereal knows that there is quite a high risk that they will not like their new choice and will have to put up with it all week whereas the chances of the skydiver’s parachute (or the emergency parachute) not opening are extremely slim, if not unheard of.  Using this logic, the cereal swapper is the bigger risk taker.

Are the biggest risk takers those who take risks despite the odds being against them or is it those who enter situations where the risk is low but the fear factor is high?  And can we always differentiate between the two?

I am viewed by many of my family and peers as a risk taker because I moved to Nigeria for no other real reason than I wanted a change.  Maybe I am.  However I did my research and decided that the risk was minimal.  Surely real risk takers are those who do things ‘off the cuff’, with no real knowledge of the situations they are entering into.  I believe so.  However, in my experience these risk takers are the people who have the most fun, happen across the best experiences and opportunities and LIVE their lives.

What has brought about all of these thoughts, I hear you say.  Well, last week I was made aware of an amazing trip to see the Durbars of Kano and Katsina, which are Muslim festivals which take place in the North of Nigeria.  I have friends who attended the trip last year and returned full of praise.  They said it was a once in a lifetime experience.  So, naturally I wanted to go.  But going this year would come with a certain amount of risk.  The troubles in Nigeria and all of the horrible scenes shown on the BBC come from the ‘North’ of Nigeria.  Bombings, shootings and such like.  It’s a sad time for Nigeria.

Some of my friends are throwing caution to the wind and have booked themselves up.  They are willing to take the risk and believe that nothing bad will happen.  They have not taken advice nor weighed up the risks and have decided to go without a second’s thought.  This opportunity, to them, is too good to miss.  I’m saddened to say that despite my inclination to ‘throw caution to the wind’ I have decided to sit this one out.  I like to do exciting things but when the risk is ACTUALLY real I just don’t have the bottle. 

It depresses me that I’m not always one of those people who grabs life by the balls and takes every opportunity and maybe I have less fun because of it but I like my life and yes I will one day skydive but, on the other hand, I will probably always buy the same breakfast cereal.

Sneezing and Snoozing

As a teacher of miniature people I am more prone to ailments such as the cold, the flu and ‘tummy bugs’ than most.  Up until I arrived in Nigeria I thought I had an immune system of steel.  I have had so many germs and bugs make their way into my system that I believed I was no more susceptible.  I am not a ‘sicky’ person.   In fact in the last five years I have had to take no time off work at all.

HA!  Since starting this term in Reception with my darling 23 munchkins (4 year olds) I have been struck down by no less than three separate illnesses; two tummy bugs and now the dreaded cold.  Being ill here is rubbish.  I have no un/underemployed friends who can come round to care for me, no elderly relatives or kindly neighbours to make me soup or cakes or dinner and my TV keeps switching off. 

I have taken two days off work so far.  The first was spent in bed – actually sleeping and sneezing but the second was spent on the couch, mostly being bored.  I’m rubbish at being ill; I need someone to keep me company and someone to make me food and someone to buy me more tissues.

Alternative Anthem?

I love this lady and I love how fitting this song is in the context of wealth and religion in Nigeria.  And why not????

Happy Birthday Nigeria

Monday the 1st October was Nigeria's Independence Day.  We had celebrations with plenty food and dancing at school and a half day/long weekend to follow.  The weekend was super and involved everything from a musical 'Freedom Hall' style concert to karaoke to the beach and back.  Thank you Nigeria.

Ela The Great

Just before I left Edinburgh for Lagos last summer I met the wonderful Natalie Ghazi in a coffee shop in Glasgow.  I liked her instantly.  She was heading back to Lagos for her fourth year and worked in my school.  She wasn’t going to be around for my first week in Lagos so arranged for her partner Ela to meet me on my first day and show me around.

Ela did this.  He picked me up and took me round the local sights, for some Nigerian cuisine and even to his mum’s house!  He really helped me settle in a country which was, and still is, totally mental in my eyes.  He helped me see Nigeria as a fun place I would enjoy living in.

Natalie and Ela have been my ‘besties’ this year.  They have allowed me to tag along to almost every night out, have dragged me out of my house when I’ve been having one of my ‘I want to be alone’ weeks and have put up with my constant questions, insecurities and naivety.  They are good people. 

Today Ela left.  He has managed to secure a place at university in the UK for a year to complete his masters.  He won’t be back for a while.  The next chapter of Natela is beginning.  I’m so glad to have had Ela around for the last year and I’m going to miss him loads.  I wish him every success and all the love in the world.  Good things happen to good people.

Lagos Caledonian Society

I joined this organisation with the aim of meeting some new people and having access to a group of wealthy expats who would look after me should I require assistance – something you have to think about when living in Nigeria.  I paid my member ship fee, filled in my form and went to their St Andrew’s Ceilidh.  Yes you heard me – a ceilidh in Lagos.  It was great fun.  They hire a band called ‘Callanish’ who fly out all the way from Edinburgh to play into the wee hours for anyone who is willing to pay the £70 ticket price for a night out.

I thought this would be the extent of my involvement with the society.  After all you don’t leave Scotland and set up shop in Africa to then spend all your time with Scottish people. However, somehow I have become part of their charities commission.  It turns out that all the money raised from the Caledonian events goes to charity; they make no profit.

Over the last few months my friend Natalie and I have been responsible for finding, visiting and working with possible charities to whom the LCS can donate their money.  It has been an amazing journey so far.  We have found seven very worthy and needy organised charities who support various groups of people in and around Lagos.  Most of the charities we are drawn to are those who support children.

Last Wednesday we helped organise a ‘Sponsor’s Night’, where all of our charities were able to speak in front of the people who give money to LCS.  It was a success and all of the presentations were truly inspiring and touching.  Hopefully we were able to encourage more sponsorship and larger donations.  I’m feeling happy that I’ve been able to make a contribution to their work.  There are so many needy people out here in Lagos and without an NHS or welfare state people do die  So far we have been able to donate around £20’000 between the seven charities and there is much more to give.